Yes, I know you've all missed me but I've been very busy completing our company website, surviving the school summer holidays and enduring a camping trip in the most luxurious tent money can buy. Keith loves camping. No really, he LOVES camping. I, on the other hand, loathe camping. Why did God invent spa hotels if we really were meant to piss in a bucket? It's just not right. The damn tent took us 8 hours to erect and 8 hours to put away, and we were only away for four days! Then the swimming pool had to be filled (not to mention emptied), and the servant's quarters decorated. The butler kicked off because he didn't like the shade of green we'd chosen for his en-suite and the whole thing just got ugly. Honestly, it was more trouble than it was worth.
The school summer holidays were excruciatingly long - seven weeks! Seven weeks = 49 days = 1176 hours = 4233600 seconds! But it felt longer! Believe it or not Scrabble got me through the darkest of days, and I even conscripted Olga into playing - badly - but bless her she tried her best! This is the type of online Scrabble with words you've never even heard of permitted - and even the expletives you have heard of are permitted. In no fewer than three moves I had managed F.U.C.K O.F.F W.A.N.K.E.R. to a creepy guy who thought he was God's gift to anagrams - and I Triple Worded him too, which was cause for a little Running Man boogie around these parts.
The Shaggers next door are no more - he's gone - so we're left with a solitary Shagette whose fingers must be worn out bloody stumps by now - I can't imagine how she's coping without the delights of the male anatomy. Perhaps I'm judging everyone by my own standards, but it may be just as well to invest in Duracell now before the rush. I caught a good glimpse of Shagette and her son Igor over the holidays (they're reasonably new to the area), and never a more bizarre duo have I had the displeasure of looking upon. Speaking as a stunning natural beauty myself, Shagette has the highest and most pronounced forehead I've ever seen, but at least the top of her head is domed. You may now be wondering why I've just remarked upon her domed head. Well, it's because Igor's head is pointed. I kid you not, the sides of his head go up and up from his high pronounced forehead and then collapse to form an apex - I have no idea how his mother finds hats for him, but she clearly considers it important to do so, as the beastly Igor has many. Perhaps his misshapen head frightens his class mates, who knows - I shall keep an eye on the local headlines and let you know.
Well, I think that's enough of me for now. I'm sure it's been a pleasure and I'll try to update more frequently now that life has settled down. Please feel free to leave your comments - I'd love to hear from you.
The school summer holidays were excruciatingly long - seven weeks! Seven weeks = 49 days = 1176 hours = 4233600 seconds! But it felt longer! Believe it or not Scrabble got me through the darkest of days, and I even conscripted Olga into playing - badly - but bless her she tried her best! This is the type of online Scrabble with words you've never even heard of permitted - and even the expletives you have heard of are permitted. In no fewer than three moves I had managed F.U.C.K O.F.F W.A.N.K.E.R. to a creepy guy who thought he was God's gift to anagrams - and I Triple Worded him too, which was cause for a little Running Man boogie around these parts.
The Shaggers next door are no more - he's gone - so we're left with a solitary Shagette whose fingers must be worn out bloody stumps by now - I can't imagine how she's coping without the delights of the male anatomy. Perhaps I'm judging everyone by my own standards, but it may be just as well to invest in Duracell now before the rush. I caught a good glimpse of Shagette and her son Igor over the holidays (they're reasonably new to the area), and never a more bizarre duo have I had the displeasure of looking upon. Speaking as a stunning natural beauty myself, Shagette has the highest and most pronounced forehead I've ever seen, but at least the top of her head is domed. You may now be wondering why I've just remarked upon her domed head. Well, it's because Igor's head is pointed. I kid you not, the sides of his head go up and up from his high pronounced forehead and then collapse to form an apex - I have no idea how his mother finds hats for him, but she clearly considers it important to do so, as the beastly Igor has many. Perhaps his misshapen head frightens his class mates, who knows - I shall keep an eye on the local headlines and let you know.
Well, I think that's enough of me for now. I'm sure it's been a pleasure and I'll try to update more frequently now that life has settled down. Please feel free to leave your comments - I'd love to hear from you.
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